Vanilla Ice Got It Right

Really, did I just say that? Yup, I did. When it comes to communication & problem solving in relationships – working or otherwise – Robert Matthew Van Winkle hit the nail on the head in, “Ice, Ice, Baby” with the salient prose, “Stop, Collaborate & Listen.” Allow me to interpret this classic masterpiece; reordered for maximum effect.

STOP

With so many demands your attention – the interruption of email, text messages, IM’s, phone calls, and people dropping by or stopping you in the hallway. The passive attention grabbers of the internet, social media sites, personal tasks, social commitments or wondering what day it is since you have a report due on Thursday at noon…it’s a wonder anything gets done under these conditions. The fix? Stop. Just stop doing anything that doesn’t relate to what is currently happening. It’s time to focus. Stop everything else. Make the physical gesture of silencing the noise and make the mental effort to pay attention. Stop.

LISTEN

People have a heard time just sitting back and listening. Devote all of that focus we created above to really hear what is being said. Turn off your mental detective who is trying to jump to a solution; silence the inner lawyer working to dismantle, rebut or defend against what it is hearing. Instead, put yourself in the speakers’ shoes, see through their eyes, and feel their feelings for a few moments.

COLLABORATE

Once everything is on the table, now is the time to open up communications by asking open-ended questions. This is not the time to deliver any counterpoints – we silenced the lawyer, remember? It’s time to ask questions that provide you with a deeper understanding of the speakers’ feelings and point of view. Open-ended questions expand the discussion because they can’t be answered with a simple, “yes” or “no”. They require more information to be provided. For instance, “How do you know when the job is complete”, “What defines success”, and “What could be done differently next time” are all excellent examples of questions that require the speaker to add specific information into the conversation. Having that meaning means that a richer understanding and leads to the best possible solutions.

Once you have followed these steps, lather, rinse and repeat or, follow the steps over and over until you have come to a solution.

Once you have it, celebrate! Perhaps with a guilty pleasure?

Cheers,

John

Cold calls suck

Picking up a phone and calling a stranger. Getting that person to subsequently do or commit to something. That’s hard. Sometimes that’s scary. And I don’t know anyone who likes cold calling. Instead, try warm calling. Warm calling involves taking the time to plan the call. Always plan your calls. The process is easy:

• Write it down
• How will you say it
• Find something to connect to

Write It Down

I don’t care how long the call will be, take notes. If you’re like most people you’ll get nervous and forget where you want the call to go, or leave out important details. Save yourself the agony and just write down your objectives and important details.

How Will You Say It

Now take a look at what you wrote. How does it sound? When you practice it – and yes, you will practice it – how does it come across? Are you using negative phrases like “I don’t know about you but…” or “We might not be the best in the market but…” While you’re taking out the negatives, take out the “but’s” too. I hit on those last year and it still applies.

Find Something To Connect To

Lastly, find something you like about the person & can relate to. Again, do it ahead of time by doing some research on the internet or LinkedIn. If you are looking to build a relationship that closes sales, do the work and know a little something about your prospect. If nothing is available then “like” the sound of their voice, their greeting, or their Southern drawl. I don’t actually care if you actually like it; do it because the enthusiasm and energy it creates will come across in your discussion that way and bring you that much closer to success. Now who wouldn’t want that?

So tell me, what do you think about the warm call?